If you've ever wanted to attract attention while driving down the street, dress up like a bride.

A stipulation of the Oscars party I attended Sunday night was that every guest had to dress like a movie character. I was orginally going to be June Carter Cash -- but Jason, my Johnny, was sick.

So I was the Corpse Bride. And in retrospect, I should have put on the veil AFTER I got to the party, not before driving there.

I've never garnered so many honks and shouts before, not even when the air conditioning didn't work and I was driving in a bikini and pouring water all over my sweaty body.

I was literally stopping traffic.

One car full of guys screamed at me, "NO GROOM?"

I wanted to say, "Oh, he's in the land of the living" -- but that's difficult to explain during a short stoplight.

Probably the funniest moment was when I got lost and had to turn around in someone's driveway. The people gawked at me from their front lawn, probably thinking "Who invited the bride?"

I have to say, from the shoulders up I did make quite a decent bride.

What the other driver's couldn't see -- the ragged hem of my dress, my dead bouquet of flowers and the plastic spiders that were safety-pinned to my dress. Very corpsey, indeed.

This entry was posted on Monday, March 06, 2006 at 4:12 PM. You can skip to the end and leave a response.